It’s been three years since I started blogging in this space. I wrote sporadically – often to vent, sometimes to share and rarely ever with a purpose. At the time this blog started out, I was interning as a Private Equity Analyst, tirelessly competing with a co-intern at using the shredder most efficiently. If I do remember correctly, the intern got a little carried away and stopped just short of shredding an important cheque. Clearly, we didn’t get any PPOs – pre-placement offers, for the uninitiated. Those wonderful things that let you breeze through the rest of your MBA with a smile on your face and a skip in your step – not to forget, with an ego to boot. If you do not get the PPO, of course, you think of it as a dot you will later come to when it’s time to connect backwards (I’m not even trying it. The one time I did, all the dots made a big fat circle that Aryabhatta also called the Zero). For at B-schools, they teach you one thing – Be Aggressive, or Be Optimistic.
But to leave the digressions for another day, a lot has happened since that rather carefree and eventful internship. I completed my MBA, got a job, went back to stay with family, was in a long distance relationship, discovered that the job sucks, moved to Mumbai and lived alone, held onto effed-up job, and got married. Sadly, the blog doesn’t even capture a tenth of it. The words don’t always flow and there’s something scary about saying everything on the www. At the same time, blogging is probably addictively cathartic and even if unpublished, memories are parked as Drafts. So, on the third anniversary / foundation day of this holy shrine, the Soul of Alec Smart has an idea. Let me tell you a little bit about these 3-minute authors aka bloggers, and what they obsess about:
Vital stats: From “45 people visited this site yesterday. Hallelujah, I’m so loved! Do you think my novel on ‘How to Make Kickass Circuit Diagrams’ will find a publisher?” to “Just 6 people bothered with this thing today. Why did I even imagine anybody would be interested in my rants?” in just 36 hours, that’s us!
No Comments: Reader comes, reader goes. Not even a +1 to ‘My Comments’ it shows. Generations of bloggers have tried to decode the psyche of the de-lurker. The one who spends 34 minutes reading our funniest posts and doesn’t even smile (i.e., leave a smiley), or the one who under the influence of our most passionate rants does not go “Aye, Aye!”
Taggin’ along: Why does nobody on the blogosphere think I’m a Kreative Krafter or an Honest Scrapper? You know, those cute little badges with virtual award trophies being passed around from blog to blog, complete with demanding to know a few random things about the awardee. How come nobody wants to know 8 honest facts about me.. I can cook up some really unusual ones.
Troll alert: A troll is to a newbie blogger what Punjab Kesari must be to Celina Jaitly. As good as it gets, and better than no press at all. To a seasoned blogger, however, a troll is an unmistakable sign that you’ve made it big. Get your own troll NOW!
Ctrl C Ctrl V: You know when you go all “Wow, this blogger and I really think alike. Hey, that’s what I feel too. Haha, I know the exact feeling. I use that phrase SO often. Hang on, I did use that phrase just the same way last week.. in JUST THE SAME POST.” Plagiarism in B-school was perceived as the most heinous crime and punished severely, but plagiarism in the blogging world my friend – once caught – will haunt you forever. Learn to change your IP address first!
Non-Disclosure: Anonymous bloggers often wonder if the fact that this new commenter called AnyOtherBlogger is really the cousin who “incidentally” spoke to you about the weather, right the day after you posted about.. guess what?… the weather!! You’re sure she’s upto something, you’re sure she’s guessed, you’re sure she’s laughing. Ok, that might be just me.
I’m sure there are bloggers out there who can add to this list, so come on! (Don’t fall for it, I’m just doing this to get you to comment, you FOBs).
Really meant in good jest. (Trolls, don’t listen to me.)